You know you are in Paris when.......

--you arrive at an airport which looks as if it was designed by an architect on an acid trip
--98% of the people on the streets are younger than you
--you wait in line at the Gare du Nord for 45 mins to buy a ticket on the TGV to Brussels and the 250 km journey then only takes 75 mins
--50 % of the population seems to smoke
--there are an amazing number of astonishingly attractive women with very long legs
--50% of the shops seem to be restaurants or cafes/bars
--even a humble omelette tastes like it was cooked in heaven
--the motorcyclists and scooter riders take off from every set of traffic lights like they are starting a Moto GP race
--there are security guards controlling the line of Russian,Chinese and young Japanese shoppers waiting to get into the Prada and Louis Vuitton shops
--the graffiti sprayers seem to be winning
--everyone drinks red wine with their meals--except for some Americans who order Coca Cola and are immediately deported
--80% of the cars are French and VW's and Mini Coopers make up most of the rest
--the buskers on the Metro can actually sing and/or play their instruments
--some Americans try to speak French when ordering in the restaurants.
Fortunately English is widely spoken .
--most,but not all,of the locals seem to be enjoying life

--and finally,and I saw this only 40 mins ago,you definitely know you are in Paris when you are eating dinner in a bistro and a man wearing jeans, a white linen jacket and a pudding basin crash helmet,aviators goggles and playing a piano accordion rides down the street outside on a unicycle.

On the plane back down under tomorrow so it's -"Au Revoir Paris".